VIII. Marriage

Let us glance first at the general obligation under which the individual lies to aid in Inaintaining the species, while fulfilling the needs of his own nature. § 230. In Tlw Principles ifBiology (§§ 334-351) was ex plained the necessary antagonisnl between· individuation and reproduction-between the appropriation of nutriment and en ergy for the purposes of indi vidual life, and the appropriation of them for the initiation, development, and nurture of other lives. Extrelne cases in which, after an existence of a few hours or a day, the body of a parent divides, or else breaks up into numerous germs of new individuals, and less extreme cases in which a brief parental existence ends by the transMARRIAGE. 533 formation of the skin into a protective case, ,vhile the in terior is wholly transforlned into young ones, illustrate in an unmistakable way the sacrifice of individual life for the maintenance of species life. It was shown that as we ascend to creatures of more complex structure and greater activity, and especially as we ascend to creatures of which the young have to be fostered, the expenditure of parental life in pro ducing and rearing other lives becolnes gradually less. And then, in TlwPrinciples of Sociology (§§ 275-277), when considering. the "diverse interests of the species, of the parents, and of the offspring," we saw that in mankind there is reached such conciliation of these interests that along with preservation of the race there go moderated jndi vidual sacri fices; and further, that with the ascent froID lower to higher types of Dleu, we tend towards an ideal falnily in which "the mortality between birth and the reproductive age falls to a nlinimum, while the lives of adults have their subordi nation to the rearing of children reduced to the smallest pOl::lsible."

To the last, however, the antagonism between individua tion and reproduction holds-holds in a direct 'way, because of the physical tax which reproduction necessitates, and holds in an indirect way because of the tax, physical and mental, necessitated by rearing children: a tax which, though it is pleasurably paid in fulfilment of the appropriate. instincts and emotions, and is in so far a fulfilment of in dividuallife, is nevertheless a tax which restricts individual developnlent in various directions. But here the truth which it chiefly concerns us to not~ is that, assuming the preservation of the race to be a de8~~dera tum, there results a certain kind of obligation to pay this tax and to submit to this sacrifice. lVIoreover, something like natural equity requires that as each individual is indebted to past individuals for the cost of producing and rearing him, he shall be at some equivalent cost for the benefit of future individuals.

534 THE ETHICS OF INDIVIDUAL LIFE. In tribes and small societies, where maintenance of num~ bel's is important, this obligation becolnes appreciable; and, as we see in the reproach of barrenness, failure to fulfil it brings disapproval. But of course in large nations whel e rnultiplication is rather an evil than a benefit, this obligation lapses; and the individual may, in nlany cases, fitly discharge his or her indebtedness in some other way than by adding to the population. § 231. Leaving here these considerations which pertain, perhaps, lnore to the ethics of social life than to the ethics of individ ual life, and returning to the consideration of mar riage as a part of individual life, we. have first to note its ethical sanctions as so considered. All activities fall into two great groups-those which constitute and sustain the life of the individual, and those which further the life of the race; and it seems inferable that if for full health the structures conducive to the one must severally perform their functions, so must the structures conducive to the other. Such part of the organization as is devoted to the production of off spring, can scarcely be left inert and leave the rest of the organization unaffected. The not infrequent occurrence of hysteria and chlorosis shows that women, in whom the reproductive function bears a larger ratio to the totality of the functions than it does in luen, are apt to suffer grave constitutional evils froln that incolnpleteness of life which celibacy implies: grave evils to which there probably correspond smaller and unperceived evils in numerous cases.

As before relnarked, there are wide limits of deviation in what we call good health; and there are everywhere, in men and women, many shortcomings of full health which are not percei ved to be such-shortcomings, however, which may be recognized on renlembering the contrast between the ordinary state of body and mind, and that which is shown after an invigorating holiday. That the physiological effects of a cornpletely celibate life on either sex are to some extent MARRIAGE. 535 injurious, seems an almost necessary ilnplication of the nat ural conditions. But whether or not there be disagreement on this point, there can be none respecting the. effects of a celibate life as mentally injurious. A large part of the nature-partly intellectual but chiefly emotional-finds its sphere of action in the marital relation, and afterwards in t~e parental rela tion; and if this sphere be closed, sonle of the higher feel ings lllUSt remain inactive and others but feebly active.

Directly, to special elements of the mind, the relation estab lished by marriage is the normal and needful stimulus, and indirectly to all its elements. There is in the first place to be recognized an exaltation of the energies. Continuous and strenuous efforts to suc ceed in life are often excited by an engagement to lnarry -efforts which had previously not been thought of. Then, subsequently, the consciousness of family respo:qsibilities when these have arisen, serves as a sharper spur to exer tion: often, indeed, a spur so sharp that in the absence of prudential restraints it leads to overwork. But the most noteworthy fact is that under these conditions, an amount of activity becomes relatively easy, and even pleasurable, which before 'was difficult and repugnant. The imrnediate cause of this greater energy is the in creased quantity of emotion which the Inarital relation, and after it the parental relation, excite; and there is to be recognized both a greater body of emotion, and a higher form of emotion. To the lower egoistic .feelings which previously formed the chief, if not only, stimuli, are now added those higher egoistic feelings which find their satisfaction in the affections, together with those altruistic feelings which find their satisfaction in the happiness of others. What potent influences on character thus come into play, is shown in the moral transformation which rnarriage frequently effects. Often the vain and thoughtless girl, caring onl~ for amusements, becomes changed into the 536 THE ETHICS OF INDIVIDUAl, r.IFE.

devoted wife and mother; and often the man who is ill ternpered and unsympathetic, becomes changed into the self-sacrificing husband and careful father. To which add that there is usually exercised, more than before, the dis cipline of self-restraint. Some effect, too, is wrought on the thinking faculties; not, perhaps, in their powTer, but in their balance. In women the intellectual activity is frequently diIninished; for the antagonisln bet",-reen individuation and reproduc tion, which is in them most pronounced, tells more especiall.y on the brain. But to both husband and wife there daily come many occasions for exercises of judg lnent, alike in their relations to domestic affairs, to one another, and to children-exercises of judgment "'Thich in the celibate state 'were not called for; and hence an in crease of intellectual stability and sense of proportion. It Inust, however, be relnarked that the beneficial effects to be expected fronl marriage, as gi ving a sphere to a large part of the nature otherwise relatively inert, presuppose a normal 111arriage-a marriage of affection. If, instead, it is one of the kind to be ethically reprobated a mercantile marriage-there may follow debasernent rather than elevation.

§ 232. But now comes a difficult question. If, on the one hand, as being a condition to fulfilment of individual life, marriage is ethically sanctioned and, indeed, ethically enjoined; and if, on the other hand, there is ethical repro-: batioD for all acts which will certainly or probably entail evil-reprobation if the evil is likely to come on self, and still more if it is likely to come on others; then what are we to say of irnprovident nlarriages ~ There needs no insistence on the truth that if domestic responsibilities are entered upon ,vithout a fair prospect of efficiently discharging them, a wrong is done: espe cially to children and, by inlplication, to the race. To MARRIA.GE. 537 take a step froln which will result a poverty-stricken household, containing a half-starved and half-clothed fam ily, is, if estin1ated by entailed miseries, something like a crime. When, after long years of pain, anxiety, cold and hunger, to adults and young, some out of the lnany born have been reared to lnaturity, ill-grown, unhealthy, and incapable of the· efforts needed for self-support; it becomes Inanifest that there have been produced beings who are at once curses to then1selves and to the cpmmunity. Severe c<;>ndemnation'Inustbe passed on the conduct which has such consequences.

. And-yet, on the other hand, what would happen if no marriages took place without a satisfactory prospect of lnaintaining a family? Suppose that an average delay· of ten years were submitted to, so that there l1light be no such risks of evil as are now commonly run. The usual suppo sition is that such persistent self-restraint w'ould be purely beneficialo This is far frOID being true, however. Ido not refer to the fact that ten years of partially ahnor~ mal life is a serious evil'; although this should be taken ac count of in estimating the total results. N or am I thi:tlking of the increased liability to domestic dissension which arises when added years have given to each of the married pair greater fixity of beliefs and diminished. modifiability of feel ings. But I am thinking chiefly of the effects on progeny. The tacit a~umption made by those who advocate the Mal thusian remedy for over-population, is, that it luatters not to children ·whether they are born to young parents or to old parents. This is a mistake.

Because many factors co-operate, the evidence is so ob scured that attention is not commonly drawn to theef fects indicated; but they certainly arise. The antagonism between individuation and reproduction implies, alnong other' things, that the surplus vitality available for the maintenance of species-life is that which remains after the maintenance of individual life. Hence the effects on ofI538 THE ETHICS OF INDIVIDUAL LIFE. spring of early, medium, and late lnarriages, are not con stant; because the surplus, though it has a general rela tion to age, is not constant at any age. But from this general relation it results, in the first place, that children born of very early marriages are injuriously affected; since where the developnlent of parents, or more espe cially the mother, is not complete, the available surplus is less than that which exists after it is cOlllplete. It results also that where maternal vigour is great and the surplus vitality consequently large, a long series of children may be borne before any deterioration in their quality becomes D1arked; ,vhile, on the other hand, a lnotherwith but a snlall surplus may soon cease altogether to reproduce.

Further, it results that variations in the states of health of parents, involving variations in the surplus vitality, have their effects on the constitutions of offspring, to the extent that offspring borne during greatly deranged lnaternal health are decidedly feebler. And then, lastly and chiefly, it results that after the constitutional vigour has culminated, and there has cOlnmenced that gradual decline which in sonle twenty years or so brings absolute infertility, there goes on a gradual decrease in that surplus vitality on which the production of offspring depends, and a conse quent deterioration in the quality of such offspring. This, which is an a priori conclusion, is verified a posteriori. }tIr.. J. Matthews Duncan, in his work on Fecundity, Fer til1:ty, 6"Yterility,and allied topics, has given results of sta tistics which show that mothers of five-and-twenty bear the finest infants, and that from mothers whose age at lnarriage ranges frolll twenty to five-and-t,venty, there COlne infants which have a lower rate of mortality than those resulting frotn marriages cOlnmenced when the mother's age is either snlaller or greater: 'the apparent slight incongruity between these two staternents, being due to the fact that whereas marriages comlnenced be tween twenty and five-and-twenty cover the whole of the MARRIAGE. 539 period of highest vigour, marriages commenced at five ,and-twenty cover a period which lacks the years during which vigour is rising to its climax, and includes only the years of decline frorn the climax.

Now this fact that infants born of mothers married between twenty and five-and-twenty have a lower rate of mortality than infants born. of lllothers married earlier or later, shows that the age of marriage is not a matter of indif ference to the race, and that the question of early or late marriages is less simple than appears. While the children of a relatively early marriage hnprovidently entered upon, may suffer from inadequate sustentation; the children of a late marriage are likely to' suffer from initial imperfection ,-imperfection which may be consistent ,vith good health and fair efficiency, but yet may negative that high effi ciency requisite for the best and most successful life. For especially nowadays, under our tregirne of keen competi tion, a small falling-short of constitutional vigour nlay entail failure. Thus, except in the positive reprobation of marriages at an earlier age than twenty'(among the higher races of m,an kind) ethical considerations furnish but indefinite guidance.

Usually there has to be a compromise of probabilities. While recklessly improvident marriages must be strongly condemned, yet it seenlS that in many cases some risk Ina.y rightly be run, lest there should be entailed the evils fiow-ing frolll too long,a delay. § 233. But what has ethics to say concerning choice in lnarriage-the selection of wife by husband and husband by ,vife,~ It has very decisive things to say. Current conversation proves how low is current-thought and sentiment about these questions. "It will be a very good lllatch for her," is the remark you hear respecting some young lady engaged to a wealthy lnan. Or concern ing the choice of sonle young gentleman it is said-" She 540 THE ETHICS OF INDIVIDUAL LIFE. is an accomplished girl and well-connected; and her friends will help to ad vance him in his profession." Another en gaged pair are described as well-suited: he is a domestic man, and she does not care luuch for society. Or, perhaps, the inlpending marriage is applauded on the ground that the lady will be a good housekeeper, and luake the best of a small income; or that the proposed husband is good-tem pered and not too fastidious. But about the fitness of the connexion as considered not extrinsically but intrinsically, little or nothing is said.

The first ground of ethical judgn1ent is the reciprocal state of feeling prompting the union. Where there exists none of that mutual attraction 'which should be the incentive, evo lutionary ethics and hedonistic ethics alike protest; 'what ever ethics otherwise derived may do. Marriages of this class are reversions to marriages of earlier types, such as those found alnong the rudest savages. The 1nariage de convenancehas been called, with some sho\v of reason, legal ized prostitution. But passing over the interdict which ethics utters on Inarriages which are mercantile, or which arise from other motives than affection, vve have to notice its further in terdicts physiologically originating. Here we see, as ,vas pointed out in the preliulinary chapter, how prevalent is the blindness to all effects save proximate ones: unques tionable as may be the genesis of rernoter effects. Only in extreme cases do either those directly concerned or their friends, think of the probable quality of the offspring ",~hen discussing the propriety of a marriage. Disapproval, perhaps rising to reprobation, may be expressed when the proposed union is between cousins, or is a union with one . who probably inherits insanity; but. consideration of the effects to be borne by descendants goes scarcely beyond ,this. A feeble' mind or a bad physique is but rarely thought a sufficient reason for rejecting a suitor. Thin, flat-chested girls, debilitated men perpetually ailing, some MARRIAGE. 541 who are constitutionally wanting in bodily energy, others who have no activity either of intellect or feeling, and many who are from this or that defect so inferior as to be unfit to carryon the battle of life, are ordinarily considered good enough for marriage and parenthood. In a Inanner that seenlS almost deliberate there are thus entailed households in which illness and dulness and bad-temper IJrevail, and out of which there come unhealthy and incapable children and grandchildren.

Ethical considerations should here serve as rigid re straints. Though guidance by the feelings is to be so far l'espected that marriages not pronl pted by thelTI must be condernned, yet guidance by the feelings must not there fore be regarded as so authoritative that all marriages prompted by them should be approved. A certain per version of sentiInent has to be guarded against. Relative ,veakness, appealing for protection, is one of the traits in wOmen which excites in nlen the sentiment of affection "the tender emotion," as Bain styles it; and sonletimes a degree of relative weakness which exceeds the natural, strongly excites this feeling: the pity which is akin to love ends in love. There are converse cases in which. a woman of unusual power of nature. becolnes attached to a man who is feeble in body or mind. But these devia tions from normal inclinations have to be resisted. Ethics demands that judgment shall here come in aid of instinct and control it.

§ 234. There remains a question uniformly passed over (because difficult to discuss, but the ignoring of which is fraught with untold disasters-a· question concerning which Ethics, in its comprehensive form, has a verdict to give, and cannot without falling short of its functions decline to give it. The sa.ying "that the letter killeth but the spirit giveth life," is exemplified not only by the way in which observance 542 THE ETHICS OF INDIVIDUAL LIFE. of religious ceremonies replaces observance of the essential injunctions of religion, but it is exemplified everywhere. A.s in the primitive legal system of the Romans, before it was qualified by infusion of the JU8 Genti'u1n,the essential thing was fulfilment of formalities rather than maintenance of right-as, among ourselves, the sacrifice of justice to the technicalities of la,v, led to the supplementary systeln of equity, intended to rectify the entailed injustices-as, again, in the system of equity the observance of rules and conform ing to orders, ever cOluplicating, became in course of time so burdensome that equity, lost sight of, was replaced by in equity, or iniquity; so is it throughout. Wherever require ments which have their roots in the order of Nature, come to be enforced by an extrinsic authority, obedience to that extrinsic authority takes the place of obedience to the natural requirements.

It is thus in a considerable degree with marriage. I do not mean merely that unions of an essentially illegitimate kind are supposed to be legitimized by a church service or a registration; but I mean' more. I luean that when the civil requirements have been fulfilled, and the ecclesiastical sanc tion has been obtained, it is supposed that no further control has to be recognized-that when the religious restraints and the social restraints on the relations of the sexes have been duly respected, there remain no other restraints. The physi ological restraints, not having received official recognition, are not supposed to exist, or are' disregarded. Hence a vast alnount of evil. The antagonism between individuation and reproduc tion comes into play throughout the entire process of ra~e luaintenance. It is true that the fulfilment of individual life largely consists in furthering species-life; but it is none the less true that from beginning to end, the last puts a limit to the first. We have but to eonsider that, delighted as the rnother is in yielding food to her infant, she yet suffers a serious physieal tax in addition to the physieal tax MARRIAGE. 543 entailed by production of it, to see tbat great though the Inaternal gratification filay be, it entails loss of gratifications which a more developed individual life rnight have brought; and that when many children are produced and reared, the sacrifices of individual life and of the pleasures which ,a higher development would bring, becorne very great. This law inevitably holds throughout the entire reproductive function front beginning to .end-with the initial part as with the terminal part ; and ignorance of, or indifference to, it entails profound injuries, physical and mental. . If the physiological restraints are not respected the life is under mined in all ways.

When, out of the total resources which the sustaining organs furnish in materials and forces, the part required for the carrying on of individual life is trenched upon beyond the normal ratio, by the part constitutionally appro priated to species-life, there comes a diminution of energy, whichaf1ects the vital processes and all dependent processes~ Chronic derangements of health supervene, diminished bodily activity, decline of mental power, and sometimes even insanity. Succeeding the ITlischiefsthus caused, even. when they. are not so extrerne, there come the lnischiefs entailed on family and others; for inability to discharge. obligations, depression of spirits, and perturbed mental state, inevit ably injure those around. Several specialists, who have good means of judging, agree in the opinion that the aggregate evils arising from excesses of this kind are greater .than those arising from excesses of all other kinds put together.

If, then, Ethics as rightly conceived has to pass jndg ment on all conduct which affects the well-being, immediate or remote, of self or others, or both; then the lack of self restraint which it condelnns in other cases, it must eondelnn in this case also. 36 OHAPTER IX. PARENTHOOD. § 235. The subject-matter of this chapter is of course only in part separable from the subject-matter of the last chapter. But though in discussing the Ethics of Marriage, as primarily concerning the relations of parents to each other, it has been needful to take account of the relations of parents to offspring, it has seerned best to reserve the full consideration of these last relations for a distinct chapter. Already it has been pointed out that in the order of Nature-~' so careful of the type ... so careless of the single life "-the welfare of progeny takes precedence of the welfare of those who produce theIne Though the happiness or misery of the married pair is ordinarily the result chiefly contemplated, this result must be held of secondary importance in comparison with the results reached in offspring-the superiority or inferiority of the children born and reared to maturity. For in proportion as race-maintenance is ·well or ill achieved in each case, must be the tendency of the species or variety to' prosper or decline.